Many clients talk to me about the difficulties they experience with feeling guilt. Mostly this is to do with relationships – perhaps not having enough time or space to give to those we really love and care about. So often we put up excuses and reasons why we can’t do something: “There aren’t enough hours in the day”. “I have two small children –I can’t put myself first”. “It feels so indulgent. There is so much that I need to do, I find it so difficult to take time out for myself.”
Pause for a minute. Look at the barriers we are creating. By finding reasons not to take care of our own needs, we are allowing ourselves to become disconnected from ourselves, and others. To be the best version of us, to truly invest our energies in to our lives, relationships and work, to really connect with the world, we need to take care of ourselves. Note – putting ourselves first, doesn’t mean putting others last.
You don’t need to spend hours. Sometimes, just minutes can be enough to energise and uplift our sense of well being. If you haven’t tried mindfulness before, check out Headspace and give it a go – ten minutes a day is enough to start making a difference. Last weekend we went to the seaside late on Saturday afternoon and I spent a few mindful minutes walking along the promenade listening to the sound of the waves crashing, pulling back and then crashing again. The Hey Sigmund article has some great suggestions such as positive thoughts, being grateful, getting some fresh air and prioritising time for fun. What small thing can you do today in order to be mindfully self-ish?